The Comfy Corner

When I think about all of the incredibly talented artists that we have lost to drugs and alcohol, I get super emotional. I mean, let's be honest here, I can get emotional over a sad-looking telephone pole. I'm an emotional person. Deal with it, y'all! But I'm talking about Philip Seymour Hoffman, Heath Ledger, Whitney Houston, Michael Jackson, Chris Farley to name but a few. All were incredible artists that had incredibly successful careers and left us too soon because they had very troubled personal lives. There is life and there is career. When we see someone up on the big screen that has had an incredible career, we imagine that their personal lives must be so glamorous and easy. But the truth is, they have to do their dishes and clean out their cabinets and drawers just like the rest of us. They aren't super humans! In fact, I'd like to theorize regular people are much more adept at living than famous people are. I have a theory that most famous people don't know how to live their regular lives off camera because they have devoted all of their time to their career and very little time to figuring out who they are. Regular people spend all of their time working on themselves. Regular people work on their relationships and spend time with their families and go to therapy and take care of themselves. Many famous people have cut out their families and their friends and have laser focused all of their attention on their careers and in that process have forgotten that they also need to have a life! And for what? For the spotlight? What good is the spotlight if you don't have a life to go home to when the spotlight is off?

It is a delicate balance between life and career. Julianne Moore, I believe, has figured out that balance. (I've ran into her several times in the city with her family and I've seen her on Ellen, so that means I know everything about her) Ellen asked her about what her biggest struggle is and she said, "It's trying to get my kids to hang up their wet towels. I'm sicking of cleaning towels!" She's focused on her life, but she also has an incredible career, because she has put in a ton of effort into herself. She has a family that she cares about, she has a home that she takes care of, she has earned her life and a career has followed her steadily through it all. Same goes for Meryl Streep and Daniel Day Lewis to name a couple more. They've worked diligently at their careers and their lives. They know how to set a balance. They know when they have to take a break. And that is the point I'd like to make. You are valuable not only because you're beautiful or you're talented or you're constantly working, you are most valuable because you are here. You are alive. You are on this planet. And it isn't about "making it" in whatever business you are a part of, it is about becoming yourself. Earning yourself and constantly striving for happiness. And that means taking care of yourself. Going to therapy. Dealing with the things that are preventing you from becoming 100% you. It is a full time job really, but you must do that first. And then your career will be so much easier and so much more fulfilling and enjoyable. And you'll live long enough to make a real impression. If Lady Gaga doesn't release an album for a couple years because she has to take care of herself, excellent! I much prefer her healthy and alive because I love everything she does. A career is meaningless if you have no one and no reason to live for it. Many folks throw themselves into their careers because it fills some hole in their lives. It is makes them feel better to be doing what they love. But what happens when you aren't doing what you love. When you are just at home being you. That time is just as valuable if not more valuable. You are never going to be able to fill the hole with your career.

You need two things in this life. You need a self and you need to be excellent at what you do. You have to be lucky to get old. It isn't given to you, it is worked at. So work at it. Live a life. Nurture your relationships organically. This business isn't about being pretty or talented (although it may seem that way). It's about working diligently at something you love and taking care of yourself along the way. So I urge you all to do this. And most importantly, stay comfy y'all.