6/17/2011

Pangs in My Womb

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The theme of recent days: babies. My sister called me two days ago with the news that she was pregnant. This will make me a two-time uncle (I already have a nephew #gettingolder). I couldn't be happier for her! Also, at my show the other night we had this little boy come onstage to be a guest speller. HE WAS THE CUTEST LITTLE BOY EVER! Every time he went up to the mic to spell he had to lower it so that he could speak into it. And then he got the word "hederaceous" (an admittedly very difficult word to spell, you can ask my friend Kevin) and, though he tried his hardest, he misspelled it. We then proceeded to sing our "Goodbye Song" to him and he waved goodbye to us the whole way down the aisle. He didn't watch where he was going, he just looked at us and waved goodbye (with a confused/sad look on his face). And it's a pretty lengthy song!


It is events like this that create a small pain in the uterus I don't have. Anytime I see babies on the subway, in the park, on the bus, on the beach, I want nothing more than to have one of my own. Ideally, multiple. I get an especially sharp pain when I see dads with their babies (nothing sexier than a man with his baby). Unfortunately, it is not an easy feat to have a child when one is homosexual and doesn't have the anatomy. So all I can do is gaze longingly at other people's children and hope to one day adopt or find a surrogate. But, let's be real, would it not be the most awesome thing to grow up with gay dads? Fabulous living arrangements, frequent trips to the theatre, and all the Barbara Streisand you could ever want! At least, that's what my kid will grow up with.

In any event, congrats sis. Your eggo is preggo and I can't wait for it to pop out so I can play with it (weird calling it an "it").

1 comments:

Kevin Patrick Martin said...

This is perfection. Sheer perfection.

June 18, 2011 at 1:47 AM  

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