The Comfy Corner

Most couples resort to calling each other weird little nicknames (in private) when they reach a certain point in their relationship: Baby, pookie (gag me), love-muffin, boo, honey, darling, pumpkin (or any other pleasant sounding fruit or veggie) etc. etc. etc. But, for straight couples, when they talk about their significant others in public, it is fairly consistent: girlfriend, boyfriend, husband, wife. Gay couples, for some odd reason, seem to have a much more difficult time using these very simple, clear titles. It's as if we are afraid that these terms might offend or suggest something unpleasant to the receiver. So we resort to euphemisms which, in my opinion, are even more revolting and unpleasant. Here are three gay euphemisms that drive me bonkers...

1) The Boy- Absolutely unacceptable! If you use this term then I am going to assume one of two things: you rented some "boy" online for your own sexual pleasure or you have a son. It is disgustingly generic.

2) Big Guy- This guy I work with always calls his boyfriend "the big guy" and it makes me laugh every time. I've grown up knowing "the big guy" to be either someone's boss or God. So if you call your boyfriend "big guy" (or big gal...yikes!) I am going to assuming that you are dating your boss or you are a celibate monk in a "relationship" with God ("Hey, guess what? God's dating like billions of other men...hate to break it to ya.")

3) Partner- I don't care if you are actually married or not, just call him your husband or your wife. Or stick with boyfriend or girlfriend. Partners are in law firms. Partners are out fighting crime together. Partners are in the "Wild West." Partners are not having sex (unless you are talking about "Brokeback Mountain." They were totally partners).