The Comfy Corner

Ever since I was just a wee Chang I have had quite a fascination with things that happen automatically for me. For instance, I would (and sometimes still do) pretend that I have sorcerer powers when I'm on the elevator and open the doors with my magic locomotus skills. I had a similar fascination with the motion sensor doors at grocery stores and drug stores. I would see how close I could get before the door would sense my presence and magically openly. I was always amazed at how I couldn't fool the doors. But now that my imagination is sadly being replaced with harsh bitterness toward the world I am growing to become increasingly frustrated instead of amazed with all things automatic, especially in the bathroom.

1) automatic sinks - the bane of my bathroom existence. I stand there in front of the sink waving my hands like a mad man and the sink shot guns little spurts of water out instead of a satisfying stream. As if some person could actually wash their hands in .5 seconds.

2) automatic hand dryers - don't actually dry your hands. i.e. frustrating. I do, however, like the crazy, high tech ones where you dip your hands in and slowly draw them out. Those are efficient. But my hands are still kinda wet.

3) automatic lights - these are especially annoying at Emerson College where I'm just sittin' on the toilet enjoying a nice poo when suddenly all of the lights turn off because I am apparently not moving enough to be a considerable presence that needs light. So I sit there flailing my arms until the lights return.

4) automatic toilets - always flushing before I'm done resulting in the dreaded wet bum. Not a happy thought. Frustrating to say the least.