The Comfy Corner

It is a hard, cold fact that we are all slaves to time. Everything we do is time stamped. Every email, every text, every BBM, every Tweet, every Facebook comment/status update/message is neatly stamped with a time (3:17 Monday, June 21, 2010). With a few clicks, I can tell you that one hour ago, Cheyenne Jackson was complaining about the humidity ("Holy humidity, Batman!") and nine hours ago Lindsay Lohan's sleep schedule was screwed up by a night shoot. As a result of all of this, timing has become one of the most crucial elements to life. You have to say the right thing at the right time or you could get yourself into trouble. i.e. emailing papers in "before midnight." Clocking into work at the correct time. And it also, unfortunately greatly applies to our social lives.

I thought I would get over this, but I haven't. So, I suppose it is time for me to confess. Whenever people don't respond to my texts immediately, my mind always imagines that they are doing something really cool or important and that their lives are so busy that they can't take two seconds to respond with a "yeah, sure" or an "lol." So I sit there feeling miserable about my dreary life reading playbill.com 24/7 as my imagination pictures the other person laughing with friends, drinking cocktails and completely forgetting about my text. I've tried that waiting game...getting a text, putting my phone down, responding an hour later. I simply can't do it! My palms get sweaty, my breath shortens, I keep glancing over at the new text I have...I MUST RESPOND! The most I've lasted is maybe 7 or 8 minutes tops.

And now, with BBM (BlackBerry Messenger), there are no secrets. When someone BBM's you, BBM tells you exactly when they read the message and at what time they received it. This does nothing but add to my anxiety because now I know if people have read my message...and I sit there awaiting a reply like a poor pound pup waiting for an owner. My heart wants to text them back "I know you read the message, are you going to respond?" but my brain tells me too play it cool and act like I have no idea that they received the message. So I wait. And when they finally respond, I'll try to give them a taste of their own medicine but (7 minutes later) I'll inevitably give in and respond.

Also, and this really drives me bonkers, BBM tells you if they are typing or not which just adds another layer to the anxiety. This means, no more editing because they will know. "Susan is typing..." long pause "Susan is typing..." long pause "haha." IT DID NOT TAKE YOU THAT LONG TO WRITE "haha" WHAT WERE YOU REALLY GOING TO SAY?

In short, time stamps mark the beginning of the downfall of man.